WHAT A IT IS:
An edible catering product created by Danish company Dansk Andels.
HOW IT'S USED:
This Youtube video from 2010 explains how Long Eggs are made. The meme was distributed primarily via Facebook shitposting groups.
WHAT IT MEANS:
The egg weighs ten tons and is synonymous with life. A Coleridgean symbol, it is what it signifies. Life verdant. Life eternal. Life both abstracted from its viscera, conceptually pointing towards a higher grounding of being, and life as it’s experienced in the odors and textures of the viscera itself. Contradictions extinguished within.
Clay eggs have been found in prehistoric Russian and Ukrainian tombs. It’s there, prominent even, in Druidic and Indian and Egyptian symbology. Brahma escaped from a crack in the cosmic egg. Pythagoras’ circle is the yoke of the world egg.
We’re told that naturalness no longer exists. We’re told that naturalness never existed. We’re told that un-naturalness never existed.
The long egg is disgusting. It’s a Frankenstein-level stitching together of things that shouldn’t exist as a unified object. Only a monster would find it appetizing.
But the power of the meme, of its humor, derives from a deeper source. This is what we have now instead of the cosmic egg or transcendental geometry. A disgusting, cheap product. Imagine being buried with a long egg.
Most memes mock the sad pretensions of consumer capitalism, finding a sort of unconscious gallows humor in the slow necrotic rot of a once enchanted world. The long egg marks the complete and total metaphysical debasement of humans.
Long egg is funny not just because it’s absurd, but because it’s an abomination.
Writer - Critic - Poet - Editor